This morning I rolled over the wrong way and aggravated whatever I did to my neck yesterday. I am sure it will loosen up as the day progresses but this morning I could not raise either of my arms high enough to comb my hair, so today’s video meetings should go well.
In January 2018 I had to go to St. Louis for work. The last morning of the trip, I pulled something, some vitally important muscle that seemed to be connected to every other muscle, while drying my hair. If I had to guess, it was a back muscle, but whatever it was, it started to spasm and within seconds it was painful to breathe or stand or sit or really do anything. I was facing down a full day of sitting at a conference table, followed by a couple of hours in an airport and a (thankfully short) flight home.
I paid something like $40 for all the Aleve packets the hotel rip-off store had on hand and gobbled them surreptitiously between meetings. The night before, my picky-eater boss had vetoed any vaguely interesting restaurant choices and we ended up eating “dinner” at the old-man sports bar in the same building as our office. Out of spite, I drank three gin and tonics. I wasn’t hungover but I did not want anyone to see me taking the Aleve and think that I was. I suppose I could have just told everyone that I was having a back spasm but a thing about me is that I really hate asking for help or disclosing weaknesses. Makes life so fun and easy!
Anyway my point is that this is the worst thing I have managed to do to myself in more than two years. At least I do not have to hide it from a bunch of coworkers, I guess.
Last night we ordered pizza and after dinner, when the dogs were F I N A L L Y asleep, I set up our new laser printer. It’s a very basic monochrome model but Wirecutter recommends it and I am so tired of inkjet printers that become useless within months. Years ago, when my husband and I briefly had our own business, we bought a very nice color printer/scanner/copier that is now a giant piece of garbage. I just need a printer that can sit and not do anything for a few months and then when I need to return something to the stupid Gap, it will wake up and just print the prepaid label without complaint or any fussing about how one of its 12 ink cartridges is only 3/4 full or its print heads are smudged. JUST PRINT YOUR PAGES, ROBOT.
The printer is in the dining room temporarily and you will never guess what both of my dogs find suspicious and terrifying. That’s right, it’s the printer! You could set off an M-80 in the back yard and they would both sleep right through it, but print something? VERY SCARY.
Yesterday I walked the puppy to the end of the block and back. I have taken to calling her Britches because every time we go outside I have to unsnap her little recovery onesie and roll it up, and I say come here, Britches! and she trots over. Anyway, as we walked down the street, a man on the opposite side stopped me and asked about her. “My wife and I are thinking of getting an Italian greyhound,” he said. And I would like you to know that I did not say “do you want this one?” I kept her and took her home and re-snapped her britches so she can continue to annoy me and bark at my printer. I told you I loved her now, and it’s true.