I did another in a long line of closet clean-outs a few weekends ago, and, while I have achieved a lot of personal growth regarding getting the bags out on the front porch in time for the charity pick-up, I still have a lot to learn.
For example: anything that seems “neat” and “fun” on the internet will cease to be so after a honeymoon period of not more than 3-4 weeks.
It has always been so:
Ravelry (wool vs acrylic butthurt)
MakeupAlley (nail polish butthurt)
Nextdoor (GUNSHOTS??!!?!?? butthurt)
The local Buy Nothing group (“nobody promptly picked up my castoffs” butthurt)
Now my new friend Poshmark is being disappointing.
Poshmark is like a garage sale overlaid with big MLM energy. It’s giving Lularoe, in a way. There are Poshmark careerists who do it as their jobs, goddess knows how; and then there are people like me who fall into the “a fool and her money are soon parted” category and need to rid themselves of barely worn Gap cardigans.
I should have known better, I really should have. But I sold a few things quickly and got high on beginner’s luck. Now I am being put in the awkward position of haggling over my fashion mistakes like a fishwife dickering over wilting beet greens in the town square.
Speaking of greens! I am in my smoothie era at the moment. I can eat a lot of spinach before 8 am if it is drowned in enough yogurt and pineapple, as it turns out! I also enjoy an oatmeal smoothie now and then, mostly because they remind me of Liquid Planet’s PB Walnut smoothies circa 2004. (That was not my smoothie era, that was my three-drink-minimum era.)
The weather is getting very warm. The dogs always want to be outside, chasing chipmunks or beaching themselves on the brick patio. Theirs is a simple life, except for the bigger dog’s new-ish insistence that someone sit with him while he eats breakfast and lunch. I am not sure what brought this on but I am sure it will cease to be a thing at some point. My husband’s theory is that this dog invents new weird habits now and then to make life interesting.
In other news, I am job hunting again. This is always sort of going on in the background but I have re-prioritized it and oh, it sucks. It always does, but there seems to be a new and worse dimension to it now.
First, there is the reality of Glassdoor, which frankly you are better off not looking at, but who can stop themselves? Not me! There is nothing quite like the sinking feeling of finding a great-sounding role, applying for it, and then going to Glassdoor to see the company you just pinned your hopes on has 2.8 out of 5 stars, like a losing Star Search contestant.
Let’s not even discuss the interviewing processes people are dreaming up these days. I’m pretty good at interviewing despite the deep conviction that I’m actually not good at anything at all, and still it exhausts me: call with a recruiter, call with the hiring manager, call with a dotted line report, call with the C-whatever-O, “assignment,” presentation of the assignment, panel interview, call with the founder…it’s truly Byzantine and I’m sure results in more confusion and analysis paralysis than good decisions.
Best part? When you get an automated rejection followed by an automated survey: tell us how we did! I have a better idea: let’s talk about it for six identical Zoom calls, and then after we do that, I’ll tell you that after very careful consideration, although impressive, you weren’t quite right.
The older I get, the more tempting it is to start saying: Look. I can do this job, which is exactly the same as allllllll the other jobs with the exact same title all around the world. I am a normal person. I am probably funnier than most. I will not care much about the job after 6 pm. Hire me or don’t, but let’s agree that this process is, at its essence, very silly. Sound good?
I will let you know how this works.